Talking about Tantra to couples, at first, is a little complex. This is because many people sell the practices of massage and tantric therapy as real lifeguards. At first, there is nothing wrong with that. After all, this type of practice can also act as a way to deepen the relationship.
However, I would like to go a little further and show the other side of the coin: Tantra for couples as a personal evolution.
In today's article, we’ll cover some tips for getting started Tantric Therapy in their relationship that go far beyond “be-a-bá”. We are going to play fair and expose how the practices really work and how you can start introducing that knowledge into your day-to-day life.
How does Tantra for couples work?
When we talk about Tantra for couples and Tantric Therapy itself, we are talking about ancient knowledge that is applied within our current society.
So it may seem strange to look at the meditations, the proposed exercises or even the massages and open yourself up to that possibility. That's because, our Western society has been severely repressed sexually and has undergone a kind of mental castration.
For a long time, sex had only two functions: procreation and for the self-affirmation of masculinity. We cannot even say that it had a function for male pleasure, as it is entirely directed at the penis and we now know that men have a broad capacity to feel pleasure as much as women.
The point is that the ancient knowledge of Tantra differs from what our society commonly preaches and invites us to open our eyes to our senses, our conscience and our emotions.
In other words: it invites us to look inside.
With that, it connects us with who we really are and takes us to a state of connection with the universe, merging body and spirit.
This is where Tantra for couples has its function: it places us intimately connected with ourselves to generate an even more intense connection in the other.
First me, then the other: Some of the principles of Tantric Therapy
Did that phrase sound selfish to you? For it is exactly the opposite. Tantric therapy teaches us to disconnect from the outside and look inward: what do we feel at that moment? What we want? What are we living in here and now?
This internal direction increases the level of consciousness and decreases the ego issue such as lack and excessive jealousy, dependence on the other, feeling of loneliness and so on.
So, looking inside yourself is not selfish, but an act of true love for you and others around you (including your partner).
In addition, to create an intense connection it is necessary to identify and know how to deal with your own energy, the energetic lack of control goes against pleasure. Therefore, the exercises sound like a training to make the situation “catch fire” in the moments together.
And this is where tantric practices begin to make even more sense. Now that we have passed the preliminaries, how about we start with the tips? I have separated here three tips and exercises to start putting tantric therapy into practice in your relationship.
First Tantra Tip for Couples: Be Comfortable
If the subject “tantric therapy” has generated strangeness with your partner. So, it might be interesting to try another approach. The tantric massage applied by a professional is extremely interesting, however, how about the two specialize and start this healing process together?
Taking a course with your partner, online or in person, shows how interested you are in the relationship and willing to do the best for it.
Here at Tantra Yoga Lab we have a specialized course both for Training in Tantric Therapy, with content for Therapeutic Training, and the Sexuality and Tantric Massage, where you can find content targeted at couples.
Our courses are completely online. Thus, it is possible for you to watch as many times as you want, wherever you want and even beside your love. Pausing the video whenever necessary. In addition, online makes the experience of both even more people,
Feel comfortable to choose any path that is comfortable for both: online courses, in person or therapists. The important thing is that the two are in agreement and calm with the agreed.
Being sincere is the basis of a relationship. But, how about being sincere in a positive way? Before starting Tantra therapeutic practices for couples, how about doing a very simple exercise that increases intimacy and opens the heart to love?
When you are together, look each other in the eye and say 5 things that you like about each other or that you liked about the time you spent together.
It doesn't have to be anything complex. Just say what is in your heart.
And take that into the relationship. Whenever you have something positive, interesting and loving, speak up. In a relationship, he gets used to complaining and little to praise.
Reversing factors is important for tantric therapy.
Welcoming the shadows
Nobody likes to see your faults, do they? But, this process of welcoming your shadows is an important step not only for you, but for relationship.
Welcoming your defects is not saying "I am like this". But, it is to understand and look with another look. Instead of judging and charging yourself, how about understanding the origin of your behavior?
That goes for you and your partner. And for the relationship.
Be loving and respectful, welcome each other without judgment and when it is necessary to discuss the relationship (the famous DR) do it calmly.
It is also interesting to speak in an open way phrases like “I feel this way” or “this is my perception of the situation” are light and do not place the blame on the other, breaking barriers and facilitating the process of friendly communication.
And above all: don't be at fault!
Don't blame it on others, let alone lay the blame on yourself. Look at the situation without self-punishment, but with a loving eye of learning and acceptance.
Well, that's it for today! Did you like our tips? Are you interested in a course or have any questions? Comment down here and let's talk about it!