When you hear the expression "Tantric Sex" what comes to your mind? Perhaps, when you are bombarded by the idea of unbridled sex sessions lasting several hours, lots of incense and flowing tapestries. Calm down!
We've already talked about tantric sex around here, so if you're interested click on this link to go deeper into the subject.
But, for didactic purposes, let's talk briefly about the subject.
The truth is that tantric sex is one of the practices present in Tantra, which is an ancient Indian tradition with similarities to Hinduism and Buddhism. That is, it may be quite different from the western view of Tantra. This is because here in the West there is a culture that is still little worked on the subject.
Often, we see tantra as just a means of increasing the pleasure of one (or more) people. Which is still true, but tantra goes much deeper than that.
It provides greater intimacy and connection for the couple. This is because it brings a profound and gentle exchange of energies, which contributed to the improvement of both, whether at the person, energetic level or as part of the relationship.
That is, in addition to a way of increasing pleasure, Tantra and Tantric Therapy are means of promoting healing in the relationship.
Healing the relationship
Why do long-term relationships go wrong? First, there is no definitive milestone. After all, we are all unique beings and each is made up of his own personal experiences, his convictions and beliefs that shape us as human beings.
So there is no definitive answer to that question.
However, there are some things that we can better understand that are responsible for internal and external processes that affect, directly or indirectly, the relationship. Especially those of daily living, such as weddings.
Our busy life, full of commitments, but sedentary, kept us apart in our movement of natural energy. If we add to this unruly food, insistent toxic thoughts, stress and overuse of technology, we have the perfect calculation of the energetic imbalance.
That is, blocking the chakras is largely responsible for some complex behaviors such as negativity, sadness, reactivity, irritability, fear, difficulty in communication and so on.
These problems make it difficult for the couple to connect and make them more likely to react badly in the face of conflict situations, which naturally happen in their lives together.
Thus, the practices of Tantric Sex act at that time as a delicate way of promoting the healing of each individual and also of the relationship, as it opens our hearts to empathy, lovingness and recognition of others as ourselves.
How to put Tantric Sex in the relationship?
Each is an individual being with their own beliefs and experiences. Thus, it is normal for one to become interested in the subject more quickly than the other. What's new are responsible for major changes. Thus, it is normal for some part of the couple to have greater resistance to the topic.
But, what helps most to resolve this issue is patience. Be patient with your partner and your relationship.
Another point is: avoid searching from sources that are not reliable.
The term tantra, tantric therapy or tantric massage in some places may suffer more misrepresentation than others. That is, it is possible to find erroneous or confused ideas on the subject. So always look for information on trusted websites and blogs.
If possible, invest in a specialized course for couples, as they approach the techniques precisely and lovingly, without forcing themselves on techniques that are of no use to both or that may still confuse them.
Here at Tantra Yoga LAB, we have the course in Sexuality and Tantric Massage, which has a unique direction, based on our personal experience as therapists, lovers and married couples.
If you want to know a little more about this approach, click here.
Tantric Sex Practices for Couples
One of the bases of any practice within the tantric (and perhaps the most important) is breathing. Breathing balances the mind, keeps us connected to our body and directs our energy.
To practice, the ideal is to first start alone to improve your ability to feel your body and your breath.
First, take a deep breath and let the air fill your genitals, up to the top of your head. Take your attention to the air that enters your nostrils and then exhale.
During your breathing, bring attention to your body. How is he at the moment? How are your senses? What do you feel, hear or smell?
How are you feeling right now?
These questions are an internal process, directed at yourself. Not to the outside.
Did you find any space for tension or pain? Pay attention there and relax.
After you are able to do this training yourself, what do you think about doing this with your partner?
Now the focus will be on breathing together! Sit facing each other in whatever way is most comfortable for you.
First, look yourself in the eye and observe yourself. Admire your partner and remember what sparked your passion in him.
Then start breathing together. Exhaling and inhaling at the same time. Remember that this is a time for both of you. That is, it is very important that they have their own pace and that they give themselves to the moment.
Forget the world outside. Right now it's just the two of you.
Take your time. You can also switch your breaths. That is, while one inspires the other, it expires and so on. This helps to activate the energy even more.
And sex after this little ritual is up to you. Nothing prevents you from lying down and spending time feeling the energy inside each one.
These were some simple practices to be practiced even by those who have never heard of Tantra. But first, we need to make a quick reminder. It is very important that you build together an adequate space for this practice.
- Leave the atmosphere pleasant and for that you can use candles, incense or oils;
- Turn off cell phones;
- Take about 30 minutes to practice.
If you want to go even deeper into how to create a pleasant space and more advanced practices for couples, check out our Sexuality and Tantric Massage course, just click here!
I hope you for the next post.